recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
What a dumb baby whore.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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