did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
