too bad you live with your parents still
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
