so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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