The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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