From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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