and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
