Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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