WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize