You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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