I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
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