i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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