There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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