you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
