What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
