we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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