so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize