She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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