piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Randomize
