Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay

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(858): View more from California

that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...

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(443): View more from Maryland

I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.

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(281): View more from Texas

They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.

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The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
Read it at the TFLN blog
(318): View more from Louisiana

I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.

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(225): View more from Louisiana

ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today

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(956): View more from Texas

I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist

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