Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me