Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize