Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(503): View more from Oregon

I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face

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(503): I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face http://tfl.nu/4e48

Replies (38) Good night (4451) Bad night (1468)
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(509): View more from Washington

Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint

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(509): Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint http://tfl.nu/0n30

Replies (10) Good night (1355) Bad night (4742)
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(501): View more from Arkansas

This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.

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(501): This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower. http://tfl.nu/hbb7

Replies (62) Good night (19852) Bad night (1790)
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(805): View more from California

a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot

(818): View more from California

god is laughing at you again

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(805): a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot (818): god is laughing at you again http://tfl.nu/4fg3

Replies (20) Good night (5148) Bad night (1671)
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(410): View more from Maryland

If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina

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(410): If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina http://tfl.nu/8dig

Replies (28) Good night (1384) Bad night (2650)
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(847): View more from Illinois

hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.

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(847): hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight. http://tfl.nu/ti0f

Replies (2) Good night (1961) Bad night (850)
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(561): View more from Florida

I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.

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(561): I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company. http://tfl.nu/ywd5

Replies (4) Good night (654) Bad night (1188)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.

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(+44): It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over. http://tfl.nu/6ffz

Replies (7) Good night (703) Bad night (1027)
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(310): View more from California

Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.

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(310): Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes. http://tfl.nu/zngo

Replies (2) Good night (1405) Bad night (543)
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(716): View more from New York

Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?

(716): View more from New York

If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love

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(716): Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you? (716): If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love http://tfl.nu/boug

Replies (1) Good night (931) Bad night (400)
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(630): View more from Illinois

So what's going on?

(1-630): View more from Illinois

We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.

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(630): So what's going on? (1-630): We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid. http://tfl.nu/vkkl

Replies (4) Good night (834) Bad night (409)
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(440): View more from Ohio

I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!

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(440): I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?! http://tfl.nu/61is

Replies (4) Good night (607) Bad night (274)
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(505): View more from New Mexico

Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."

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(505): Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you." http://tfl.nu/718r

Replies (3) Good night (551) Bad night (597)
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(323): View more from California

This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.

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(323): This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin. http://tfl.nu/blfu

Replies (0) Good night (658) Bad night (258)
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(469): View more from Texas

I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace

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(469): I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace http://tfl.nu/grfb

Replies (1) Good night (164) Bad night (294)

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