The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
