it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
