What a fucking waste of an outfit
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
