dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
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At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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