Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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