what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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