Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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