She announced her abortion via fbk
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
