just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
