so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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