Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
