i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
He has the fingertips of a God
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