If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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