She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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