if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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