I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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