I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
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