Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.

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(256): View more from Alabama

So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.

(256): View more from Alabama

that was the beginning of the end.

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(256): View more from Alabama

Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.

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(678): View more from Georgia

I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(201): View more from New Jersey

I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am

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(281): View more from Texas

seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout

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(815): View more from Illinois

I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Why is there a cash register on top of my car?

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(423): View more from Tennessee

Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world

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