everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
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He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
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I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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