She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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