I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
