I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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