Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize