You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
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