five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.