Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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