Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
