I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
