If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Dick very happy bro
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I love you.
Bad choice
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
