I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
