Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
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